You know what, I was going to make this a private journal post, but I think I leave it open. Emily is almost ready for public eyes. That’s not to say that it’s done. I hear that films are never done, they’re just abandoned. That’s why there’s 17 versions of Blade Runner floating around.

I’m almost there – and this has to be the scariest moment in the process.

I think it’s so scary because I’m alone. I bear the weight of all of it. It’s my baby.

The last thing I want to do is come off pretentious on this blog posting. That’s the trouble with posting in public, I’m extremely mindful of my public persona – I obsess over it. I’m so vain, I probably think that song is about me.

It’s not my first film – but it is my first solo project. It is my first “serious” project -my first project where I knew what things meant. Maybe I only thought I knew what they meant.

There’s a scene in my film where Paul imagines what meeting Emily will be like. He says all the right things and scores the girl. Then he imagines the worst possible scenarios where he gets slapped. What happens is something entirely different. She doesn’t show up.

I’m going through the exact same feelings – the best and worst outcomes run through my head.

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