Okay, I’ve got to post this little email exchange… because frankly… whenever I get cursed at… it’s usually funny. I’ll hide the name to protect the ignorant:

—————– Original Message —————–
From: Some Dude
Date: May 30, 2007 9:18 PM

I have alot of ideals to make million’s…I’m a writer/director independent check out my page…

Some Dude

To which I reply:

—————– Original Message —————–
From: Gospel John
Date: May 30, 2007 11:53 PM

Ideals? You sure?

Perhaps it was just a typo… but no sir:

—————– Original Message —————–
From: Smed Dude
Date: May 31, 2007 11:27 PM

Yes Ideals an yes Gospel John I’m sure check out the name’s to these titles.

“District Of Money”
“Zone 5″ Or “5th Zone” This Is The New StarWars
“Till They Come”
“I’m Death”
“Heist Kid” Comedy

I have all the tools but not the rules you feel me yet Mr.Gospel I am the Million Dollar Baby yes I’m I just need a partner as hungry as me yes I’m that good,with ideals,an brainstroming for good films an short one’s.

Guess not, so I probe a bit further:

—————– Original Message —————–
From: Gospel John
Date: May 31, 2007 11:31 PM

Huh… frankly I’m sick of writers with ideals… I’d much rather here some good ideas.

Too bad all you’ve got are ideals.

John Hess

Now I’m motioning with my hand that something has flew completely over his head:

—————– Original Message —————–
From: Some Dude
Date: May 31, 2007 11:38 PM

What doe’s this mean… You can here my ideals any time but how, I have more to offer then just ideals.

Wow… this is getting bad:

—————– Original Message —————–
From: Gospel John
Date: May 31, 2007 11:49 PM

I don’t care about your ideals. I want to hear ideas.

Do I need to spell it out for you?

John Hess

Ahh… delicious word play. Too bad it was lost on this pour sap.

—————– Original Message —————–
From: Some Dude
Date: Jun 1, 2007 12:27 AM

Here’s a Joke For You fuck You John Hess…lmao

Time to dispense some good ol’ fatherly advice:

—————– Original Message —————–
From: Gospel John
Date: Jun 1, 2007 12:38 AM

Wow… that was genius.

Learn to spell kid. You’re not going as a director or filmmaker if you can’t spell.

And the creme de le creme…. his finally kiss off to me.

—————– Original Message —————–
From: Some Dude
Date: Jun 1, 2007 12:58 AM

Look Here Mr. Hess I know your good but damm why do you have to be like that it’s cool fuck it I’ll look some where else for help an my shit is way better then your’s you jerk an I can spell your not even funny you look like your ass stink’s you get no pussy an you have a very little white winer when you do try to have sex the white girlssay what are you doing with that Hesster Hess I can’t even see it were will it go.You won’t even give me cum your just a waste of time.An by the way that tie that you have on is just as yellow as it can be it looks very dry an it probley stinks too cause you have that suit on in like all of your shot’s you are boring I was tryin to help that’s it ass whole an your right I am a genius. An by the way you fuck off punk you missed something out of you sentence you ass licker tight suit yellow bow tie wearing wigger.lmao Is this Comedy or what? get it together brother we make mistake’s some times but thanksI have some good ideas for you I learned how to spell something today thanks Hess..

You Better Do Something with me I can help Mr Hess..

What did you miss out?

Wow, he finally spelled “ideas” right.

To think… English was the language of Shakespeare!!!

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